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December 21, 2012
Congratulations, Future #WIFs.

Congratulations to all you future #WIFs on finishing up the year/semester. We see so many of you on our Instagram and Twitter:

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We hope our site gives you an accurate depiction of your post-grad life: slave hours and heavy drinking.

Your Friend,

#WheninFinance 

Share your Instagram photos by tagging them with #wheninfinance. To have your pictures shared anonymously from our Instagram, send us an email.

December 3, 2012
Holiday Party Tales: The Wives in Finance

Wives in finance are, quite possibly, the most interesting breed of human being in existence. Every time I’ve met a senior partner’s or director’s wife, she is an unknown strain of bizarre, worthless, or mean. It’s become the standard.

Once upon a time, I’d met my managing partner’s wife and, of course, she rolled in on the Wives In Finance Bizarro Train with glitter in her hair and spikey leather pants. She was some sort of faux-rock-and-roll like Avril Lavigne. She had a general disdain for the hoity toity, the schmoozey charity events, and was miserable about basically everything else that came along with being a wealthy fund manager’s wife.

And somehow, she thought we were friends. Maybe this is because I was usually the only other female even close to her age at events. Or maybe she could sense my bitchy undertones. I went with it.

She clung to me at our Christmas party. We drank and made fun of people, talked shit, took pictures, etc… At one point in the evening she said  to me “let’s get away from everyone and go to the bathroom real quick”.

I thought we were just going to powder our noses and get away for a second. So when we both walked into the single-person bathroom, I didn’t think anything of it. I started rummaging through my clutch for a lipstick and when I looked over, I saw that she had kicked off her shoes that cost more than my rent, and was squatting barefoot atop the toilet, her underwear pulled to her knees, and she was casually taking a shit in front of me. Just shitting away.

And it wasn’t a little shit; it was a full-sized shit. If this shit was a car, I’d say it was a four door sedan. It was a 7-series shit.

My world started spinning backwards as I realized I was watching my boss’ wife take a shit. All the while, she was still talking away about something, as if it was no big deal. I wondered how many before me had witnessed this Wife In Finance take shits. There must be hundreds. Or at least five or six.

I wondered how to nicely tell her that “no matter what happens, we will never be real friends; your husband signs my paychecks; you cannot shit in front of me like this ever again”? I realized this had gone too far. And I never made eye contact with her again.

-SKIRT.


Do you have a legendary holiday party story to share with us? Send us your goodies; we’ll protect your anonymity. 

November 27, 2012
The Holidays at #WheninFinance

The holidays are a magical time of the year. For normal people, they can be marked by the first snow, putting up the Christmas tree, or the day after Thanksgiving. For #WIFs the holiday season is marked by the official invitation to the holiday party.

The Holiday Party is one of the best times of the year: perhaps second only to Bonus Day. When we received our invitations this year, we couldn’t help but to think over The Ghosts of Holiday Party Past. Like the time time the secretary threw up behind the booth and then made out with a VP, making the interns dress up as elves, and marveling at meeting some of the #WIF wives for the first time.

Not to mention, the holiday party is usually when most inter-#WIF relationships start.

We’ll be sharing some of our favorite and worst holiday party stories over the next couple months. Send us some of your memories in story, gif, or picture format in email, twitter, or instagram. Make sure to tag them with #wheninfinance.

Some of our favorite ones might receive some holiday presents in the new year.

November 1, 2012
When I try to leave work early on a Friday but then get staffed:

Credit: M/NY/IBD

November 1, 2012
Life as a first-year #WIF:

October 22, 2012
When I’m on #WIF and my associate comes up and asks what I’m working on:

Credit: M/NYC/IBD

October 10, 2012
Dating a #WIF. Date Night:

Expectation:

Reality:

Credit: Skirt

October 3, 2012
When Too Many #WIFs Are Under One Roof, Down Under:

Received in the WIF inbox today: this hilarious email chain that has gone viral from the #WIFs down under.

Apparently a bunch of #WIFs shacked up together and one in particular was very set on certain house rules. The best one being a Skirt Tax, apparently referred to as ‘Birds’.

Click through the images below to see the full emails. 

The first picture here shows the original email.

The second picture here shows the reaction.

Wow!